Jack's A Jolly Polly
by Ace x Girl x Called x Ace XD
Summary: Lestrade is forced to ask Torchwood for help. Jack's in a flirty mood and Owen's a right crank. My First Crossover, Sherlock and (Hopefully) humorous fic.


Sherlock looked at the body. He knew something was getting to Lestrade but before he could lift his eyes to deduce what was bothering him, the Detective Inspector decided it was time to speak up:

"Sherlock," he began, "I've had to get Torchwood on to this...it... seems like their sort of thing." Sherlock fought a chuckle. Not just because Torchwood was coming, but because it obvious (only to him) that Lestrade resisted saying 'unfourtunately'.

"Torchwood?" John quizzed.

"Yes. They're a rather _interesting_ organization - set up by Queen Victoria to combat the threat of extraterrestrial beings" Sherlock explained... in a split second.

Lestrade agreed: "Exactly"

"But Captain Harkness is coming isn't he?" Sherlock looked happier than anyone thought possible.

Lestrade looked away, blushing slightly.

"What's wrong with him? I mean-" John's questionable explanation was cut off by his flat mate:

"He's very fun to be around...isn't that right Lestrade?"

Wait for it... smirk. Donovan's jaw had dropped to the tiled, sqeaky-clean floor. As had Anderson's.

He remained silent (Anderson and Donovan too). Although the silence was short-lived, broken a moment later when the door flung open and send a rippling, vibrating crash through the building. A passerby claimed the building shuddered.

"Never fear! Torchwood is here!" A man with an American accent and a grey World-War two coat came waltzing in "Morning Millie" he winked to Lestrade, who had face palmed himself. He regretted this already.

"Lestrade" Jack smiled.

"Harkness" the reply.

"Lestrade"

"Harkness"

"Millie"

"Hurry up!"

"Someone's a jolly Polly today ain't she?"

Sherlock and John couldn't help but snigger under their breath.

"Ey Jack! Less flirty, more looky. I'm more annoyed than usual. Coffee boy there was just about to make an Espresso when we got this call so let's get it over and done with" A man with short brown hair and white, plastic gloves put down some bags and he was right ... he looked pretty angry...and red. Very red.

Meanwhile, Jack strode over to Sherlock and John:

"Morning Sherly. Who's your friend?"

"I'm Dr John Watson" He held an out-streched hand. Jack accepted happily:

"Captain Jack Harkness"

"Oi! What did I just tell you? Are you going to get here or am I gonna have to drag your American backside here?" Owen complained. This time every body deduced: annoyed.

"Owen, you know if you say that he'll happily accept!" Gwen reminded him, trying desperately to lighten the mood.

Tosh switched on a machine, which let of a ear-murdering sound. Both she and Gwen put in some headphones and just carried on - humming and tweaking.

"Yep! Don't need reminding thanks, Gwen. Besides, if Ianto finds out, I'd done that, he'd be all over me faster than you can say: _Shut up, Ianto and go and make some coffee for god's sake that's the whole bloody reason your here..._ and also: FOR GODS SAKE TOSH TURN THAT BLOODY EAR KILLER OFF!"

Owen grabbed his gun and shot the machine, whilst now-present sparks flew over Gwen and Tosh, sizzling on their fragile, delicate skin.

"_OWEN_ THAT'S PRICELESS EQUIPMENT!" Tosh shrieked.

"_Was_ Tosh. _Was _priceless equipment..."

Tosh cursed under her breath and made a mental note to hide Owen's car keys again in the plant pot. Again. Buried.

"Owen, just apologise!"

"Why should I Gwen? I'm bloody exhausted, I haven't had any miracle coffee today and oh yeah you forgot I BLOODY DIED DAMN DAYS AGO!"

"Ianto owes me a favour - I'll tell him not to make your coffee" Tosh blurted out.

Wait for it...:

"I'M _SO_ SORRY TOSH PLEASE FORGIVE ME!" the medic begged. Jack just laughed.

"That's bloody amazing that is," Gwen gasped, "can you get him to buy me a new phone, when he shot it 'cause the ringtone annoyed him?"

Tosh just smiled and winked at her.

"The most expensive" was whispered in the chilly wind.


End file.
